Hey look, I care!

First off, fishnets and heels make me feel sexy. And feeling sexy makes me feel confident. That is all.

I used to not care about my appearance. I would leave the house wearing whatever I felt like, not caring if it matched, went together, or even looked good. Mostly jeans and black... black T-shirts, grey shirts, never really any color. And when I wore color, I never really felt all that comfortable in it. I never really wore anything that could be considered daring, because I was getting the impression from everyone that I should be ashamed of my body, because it wasn't perfect. So if there was something that I could wear to hide myself, then I should.

But I'm not... cringeworthy. I have a belly, and large thighs, yes. But I also have a waist. Do you know how long it was before I realized that? I think I may have actually jumped for joy, because here was a sign, a sign that I did have a shape. And it wasn't round. The more I studied myself in the mirror, and the way that clothes fit me, I realized that I do have a pretty decent shape. Curvy, but I'd much rather be curvy than stick thin.

Now, I actually enjoy getting dressed. I take the time once a week to put together outfits for the week, and while I try to stick to those outfits pretty exactly there are some times when the outfit just isn't working out the way that I thought it should. But that's OK, because that's some of the fun of it - letting outfits develop the way that you feel they should. Or trying some new trend because you have the clothes for it, and who gives a damn if you don't have the right body type?

I read an article today on someone else's blog called "Come back, Pretty" or something like that. I agree with the basic premise - when you leave the house, you should make sure that you look alright. It wasn't that long ago that women were wearing full skirts, crinolines, dresses, heels, gloves and hats every time they left the house, because it was what was expected of them. I don't know when society stopped expecting that of women, but I don't think it was a good idea. I like the more lax rules of dressing that we have now, but I like the idea of putting your 'best face forward' when you go out into the world. (This doesn't mean that I am above schlepping around the house in sweatpants and all my lovely grossness. It just means that I try not to bring that OUTSIDE.)

But yes. For the past two months I have been planning my outfits. For the past week and a half I have been wearing makeup every time I leave the house. Even if I don't plan my outfit, I am sticking to my personal style rule of never wearing sweats outside of the house. There are some limits, after all.

A Good Day

Yes, I know that I am VERY creative in my blog titles, aren't I?

So due to a rather drastic scheduling change, I have gone from working three nights a week to four days and a night. And I am very much NOT a morning person. At all. In no way shape or form. So this has kind of been a bit of a problem for me.

Although I kind of like my routine now. My mother isn't much of a morning person either, which meant that when I was in school, mornings were hectic and not much fun. But now that we are both on almost the same schedule, she is actually making me breakfast and we are getting along a lot better than we had been. I like it.

Moving on. I decided that I would wear an awesome outfit today to combat the fact that it is Monday. And I did. Grey tank top with a white button down layered over it, black and white print skirt, tights, Sanitas clogs. Jewelery is my normal rings and watches, a string of pears, and a red jeweled bracelet that someone picked up for me at recycling. Hair is up in a hat, as per usual. Makeup: white shadow, powder, RED lipstick.

But I think the most important thing is that I am wearing my septum ring out! I got this piercing over two years ago, and it is only now that I am... comfortable sharing it with other people. I had my reasons for keeping it hidden, and I still love the fact that I can do that, but... I've reached a point where I don't feel like I have to. It's like the rest of my body modifications - when I got them, I planned them so that I would be able to hide them easily. But I don't have to. I actually took the time to explain my tattoos to my grandmother yesterday, and she seemed to understand them. (Of course, I also have done this before, but still. Progress.)

So maybe this isn't a good day because of my outfit. Maybe it's a good day because of my confidence!

Lazy day!

Monday is supposed to be my day to go home, bum around, do some cleaning, and relax. This was, of course, interrupted by work, and so by the time I got home I only had about 2.5 hours before I had to be back at work for a meeting. So I, of course, wasted much of that time watching Say Yes to the Dress.

Anyway, pulled on a pair of wide legged jeans, a blue 3/4 length sleeved T-shirt with an empire waist, a scarf, a hat, and sneakers. I pretty much feel like I'm wearing pajamas, but I look kind of professional. I hope.

Blah. Another post brought to you solely by boredom!

Just a big ol' pile of sexy.

Have you ever had one of those days where you just felt like absolute shit and nothing was going right? Well, that's the kind of day that I've had. I had to work last night, so I felt kind of off when I got home because of that, my sister was being a brat, my mom wanted to do something nice, and it was all just. too. much. Things started to get slightly better once we figured out what we were going to do, and I went and took a shower in preparation to make myself look slightly more human.

For some reason my chest cold is coming back, which means that not only do I fell pretty run down, I also sometimes break into hacking spasms which make me sound like I have smoked a pack a day for at least five years. It's disgusting, and I really wish that there was something that I could do about it, but for right now, there's not. So, I simply deal with it. (I'm not being unsafe about a medical thing or anything, I'm just pretty sure that it's the same thing that I dealt with back in November and I already have the doctor's bill and medications from that visit. Not fun.)

But we had made plans to go out, so go out we must. And there were problems galore there. It was one of those days where most of my clothes didn't want to fit right, which meant that I went through three pairs of pants before I finally found a pair that didn't make me want to scream when I put them on. I threw on a couple of shirts, my trusty clogs, and was finally ready to go.

The surprising thing was that the entire outfit ended up not looking half bad. One of the things that I did was work with my style restrictions for the day, and ended up wearing soft comfy clothes that felt like pajamas. Top that off with one of my many large, hair hiding hats, and I was ready to conquer the world.

That is, until I came home and about fell over. Now I have to go and see if I can get my TV working again...